Goa for First timers

This is not a travel summary so if by mistake you landed here looking for some travel tips then do check out the archives because that is the next thing I am going to write. This post I am writing about my Goa experiences as a first timer and things I learned from this trip so you can take a few do’s and don’t’s if you are visiting Goa as a first timer.
If you are a first timer never visit Goa alone, high chances are that most of the budget will be lost in travelling and staying without any actual fun. For a first time in Goa group helps you in getting settled and knowing places around. Group lets you observe things and plan for your next trip. There is 100% chance that you are going to be cheated as a first timer. The thing is that a group of first timer feels less cheated compared to the same when it happens alone. I have some experiences in that field so you can trust me. Because you are a first timer always take someone who has been to Goa before because he knows how stuff works otherwise taking experiences on your own is another part of adventure as well.
When mentioning cheaters, taxi drivers who pick you up from the station which you must not opt for ( I’ll explain this in my next blog why) are capable of making chutiya out of you in a flash. Never talk to a taxi driver and let him feel that you are a first timer. If you want to enquiry things then there will be plenty of time for that. 
First time is with friends, 2nd time is with girlfriend. Pyar Ka Panchnama changed Goa into this Bachelors only tourist spot. Trust me, everyone who visits Goa in group of guys, no matter how much he talks highly of Pyar ka Panchnama thing, must have had fantasized “Yaar ek baar girlfriend ko le kar aana hai” also for forever alone people like me “honeymoon pe idhar hi aaenge”. 
Always have sea food. Goa means sea food. Anything else is a sin on personal level. We did  couple of sin by having chicken a few times, but then every time, every bite of sea food we have was glorious, each bite took us one step closer to the heaven. Normally I hate pomfret. Everywhere I have tried it is full of masala and damn oily but the one we had in Goa gave me orgasm in the mouth, it was amazing just too good. Same story with prawns, the taste was better than sex if I can describe it in the best way.
Adventure sports is a must, people *Points on someone I know* act macho and go few meters inside the sea while the life guarding is watching them and tease those who prefer to stay at corner because they find it stupid. Real machismo is when you are left on your own few feet from ground in the air on your own. Adventure sports is all about overcoming your fear but try going for it alone because in pair of two guys pictures come extremely hideous. 
Get drunk, booze is extremely cheap here. If Kashmir is a paradise for couple in love *points at someone reading this post* Goa is a paradise for drunkards. You can again be a fool in choosing what place to buy beer and that will result in wasting a lot of money. Same beer that you can get from outside the beach for 30 bucks will cost you around 90 if you buy it from some pub or restaurant, this was just an advice and everything comes with its advantage so it depends.
Last but not the least, Goa is an excellent place to test your photography skills. Anyone with a camera and ability to press the click button can look like a photographer here, anyone (people like me) with an extra ability to Photoshop those pics can look like professionals. 
So this was Goa for Dummies sorry first timers. If you know someone who is planning to visit Goa for first time don’t let them read this blog because no matter how many tips and travel blogs you try you’ll eventually get things fucked up and I don’t want people coming back blame their fuck-ups on me.

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