I wrote this topic when I was in MTV community or orkut long time back and it got copied into various communities in their own version. So if you have read a version of it somewhere then it’s not my responsibility. At that time there was orkut today we have twitter and the different entities exist here as well.
So the idea is what would have happened if Newton tweeted about Apple falling on his head as soon as it happened. Newton who is already famous as a genius douche-bag among his fellow tweepals and other wannabe physicists and scientists start counter tweeting about it making the apple trend at number 1 worldwide
And here comes certain reactions from the regular twitter entities that start flowing soon after in 140 words only.
A Hardcore Hinduvadi: This is called Gravitation which is already defined in Vedas (which is true) the land should be declared holy and a temple should be made at that spot.
A Muslim Fundamentalist: A fatwa should be declared on the Apple.
Theist: God wants to tell he has lost his faith on mankind and now throwing apples on people out of disappointment.
An Atheist: It’s all science #lulz
An optimist: Lucky he that apple fell on his head and not bird poop.
A pessimist: An apple is of no significance, it’s a disgrace.
A Liberalist: The apple is a symbol of free will and *says something BLAH followed by a rant against Narendra Modi*
A Standup Comedian: I thought Apple iPhone fell on his head (gets 50 RTs for this shitty tweet)
Our PM: _______________________________
Rahul Gandhi: We prevent 99% apples from falling on people’s head its 1 apple that somehow fell.
A TV correspondent: Tonight at 9 the apple will be in our studios. What the exclusive report first on our channel.
Digvijay Singh: Iske piche bih RSS ka hath hai.
Anna Hazare: Bring the apple under lokepal.
A wannabe twitter celeb : *Compares apple to Aaesha Takiya’s boobs then reminds how Kingfisher is gonna fall just like apple because it is red in colour too*
Taslima Auntie: The Apple is a symbol of male dominance that is going on from ages and how it is not going to continue now. *Blames Indian Men and our culture for something something in her next tweet*
[Some #slytweets follow after]
Poonam Pandey: I’ll strip for the 100th apple that falls on someone’s head and this time I am determined.
[someone replies the tweet comparing apple’s size with her boobs]
KRK: What apple. Once I was sitting under a Watermelon tree and a Watermelon fell on my head. (seriously? Watermelon tree?)
Rajdeep Sardesai: Today an apple falls, tomorrow others will follow. Good Night
Now coming to few of my special friends on twitter 😀
@Apple_Kaur : Why everyone in India talking about me? Did Karan Johar finally read my Blog?
@ABHIandNOW : *looks at the TL,posts something that pisses off 60% people on his TL*
@IndianTweeter : *posts 100 tweets about how people are talking ONLY about apple and ignoring other major problems in this country* *Also posts how much he loves his apple iPhone*
@DesireMaze : I feel banana is is a much better option which contains lots of good things required for human beings (don’t haaaw me now ) 😛
@LoKarloFart : Whats the big news here, If mango would have fell from that apple tree then some big news would have happened.
@HelenOfAhoy : I can post tweets about apples for months now
@anushreekejriwa : I hate apples x-( also just because its an apple it doesn’t means its a fruit.
@scotchism : The Apple was A-pal ka mehman on the tree
@Bindaas_Kudi : I like guava 😀
@Bedardi_Raja : I’ll logout when the next apple falls
@_DesiGirl : I’ll celebrate this news by shopping at commercial street. Anyone wanna join me?
@BreezyBeer : #ReplaceAMovieNameWithApple – Apple Khaya to Darna kya.
@SunithaNahar : In Bangalore Apples are 100 rs KG 😦
@UdaasPriest : Alone I sit under my apple tree…..
@Pinnsta : Once an apple fell on my head and I forgot to take its pic 😦
@superrrnickkk : Apple flavor Hookah is over rated
[replies @ScrewDrivr : But Apple flavor vodka is not #TiLiLI ]
@Sinful_Reveries : I want apple vodka to fall on my head
@coolfunnytshirt : The Apple should join RCB since the apple was red like RCB T-shirt and fell down (did anyone understood what I just said ?)
@discopiggu : Smart people drink apple juice oink oink.
@Riddhiculous : The Apple is red and so is my lightsaber
@SahilBulla : The force was not with him. Poor apple.
@raggedtag : We don’t get apples on twitter. Also my baby is crying so I don’t have time for this
@BIRD__watchar : My internet is so slow that if an apple falls it would reach my head on new year’s eve.
@Kriishy : I call him the #ForeverAlone apple
@shubham23_ : Orange Juice > Apple Juice also Appy Fizz is overrated
@DsilvaStar : :O 🙂 😛 Wow Apple 😀 😀 😀 😛 I love Apples 😛 😛 😀 😀
@Pakespeare : This reminds me to make apple pie this week.
@iYatinGupta : Bencho kya apple apple, G#$# me daal lo apne apple.